I wish I was a vampire so I could cry dramatic Blood Tears.

So... male pregnancy fan fiction. Good grief. Yes, you read that correctly: male pregnancy. And I don't mean male pregnancy in terms of the cute little seahorses who gestate fertilised eggs whilst the female swans off and has fun elsewhere.

I've stumbled across it in Harry Potter fanfiction during my two week spell of insanity last year; usually where poor Harry is paired with Malfoy (well y'know, love and hate are practically the same thing!) whose half-Veela ancestry sends him into heat (!!) and searching for a mate. Inevitably, The Boy Who Lived ends up fathering a new Malfoy. Ick. Today I had the misfortune to read a Motley Crue MPREG. Alas, it was self-inflicted, I just couldn't stop myself from clicking on each new chapter. I blame my inner devil.

Now that I'm done washing my eyes out with bleach, I shall relate the sorry tale. Nikki and Vince are married. Awww. In this universe, men can have babies with ease! I haven't seen anything in this fic to suggest that the babies are gestating anywhere other than the bowel or lower intestine.

So. Let the shredding commence.

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