Why I shouldn't watch TV alone.
Jun. 23rd, 2006 08:17 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
allanaFirst of all there was "99 Stupid Injuries" which came on just as I was about to eat dinner. After seeing a couple of nails stuck through skulls I turned over.
*If I could imitate the sound our TV makes I'd insert the cool sound here. But I can't, so you get this drivel.*
Smallpox bioterrorism docudrama. Fine, I thought, until they showed historical footage of horrendous untreated smallpox cases. I'd be rivetted at any other point in my life, but all I can do is sit and imagine Speck covered in pustules and screaming soundlessly. I pick up the remote again.
BBC News 24. Utterly boring but safe. I proceed to very slowly finish dinner--one of my favourite meals ordinarily but tonight? Overloaded with chilli and my mouth now hates me. Woe.
After consulting Digiguide, there is absolutely nothing I want to watch on TV at this point. I end up watching football and giving my usual vague delayed-reaction commentary to Dave, who is in London. "There's a man. He tried to score, but the goalkeeper huddled over it, so he couldn't. He looks pissed off. No, I have no idea what the number is. Oh, he was in yellow."
After Dave goes back to his hotel I decide to go and watch a DVD in bed, apres injection. (Which are going well, btw. I'm just running out of virgin flesh to use. Twice-used spots are tough.) It takes me 10 minutes to choose a DVD as we now have too much choice. With the Chronicles of Narnia in hand I triumphantly ascend the stairs--which sounds better than waddling up the stairs, doesn't it?--only to discover that there isn't a spare power point for the DVD player.
I believe I ground my teeth for a while after this. When I did eventually hoist myself into bed, after checking the TV guide yet again, I settle on National Geographic as that looked interesting and safe. My definition of safe mostly includes no programmes lovingly detailing the life of jumping spiders or other insects. I couldn't have been more wrong.
I caught the tail-end of a programme about Supervolcanoes. Now I love volcanoes from a viewing perspective. They're fascinating. Tonight? I'm on the verge of ringing Dave--before remembering that he has no signal in his dungeon--and screeching that we don't have a bunker or a What To Do In Case of Volcano Plan for Speck. Heck, we don't even have a regular disaster plan or a designated meeting point! Plus, this particular program focused on the woes of America with no thought to the rest of the world, so I had even less idea of what to expect. Other than less crap on TV.
The next program--which I blessedly fell asleep half-way through--was about the risk of a major earthquake hitting the UK. By this point I wished that I'd taken the extra time to find a book instead. Apparently! There are a bunch of fault lines going through the UK that have long been thought to be dormant. No, fissures coming off fault lines, my bad. But after the quake in Dudley (4.0, IIRC), a devastating quake in Belgium (which I'm sure I never heard about) and a similar sort of thing in Australia (which I definitely never heard about), seismologists in the UK are very concerned.
People! We have no earthquake disaster plan! (The voice-over guy said that with such relish.) One of the lines they showed on the diagram before zooming off to talk about German fissures, ran across the south of England hitting both London and Bristol. (Apparently there's a nice big fissure which runs north to south through Germany, from the North Sea to Cologne. They focused on that, which meant the program title was a bit misleading.) So, is it time to move back to Scotland and force Dave to work remotely? I have no bloody idea as I fell asleep.
Surprisingly, I didn't dream. However, I'm not sure that I'll go anywhere near the TV today....
*If I could imitate the sound our TV makes I'd insert the cool sound here. But I can't, so you get this drivel.*
Smallpox bioterrorism docudrama. Fine, I thought, until they showed historical footage of horrendous untreated smallpox cases. I'd be rivetted at any other point in my life, but all I can do is sit and imagine Speck covered in pustules and screaming soundlessly. I pick up the remote again.
BBC News 24. Utterly boring but safe. I proceed to very slowly finish dinner--one of my favourite meals ordinarily but tonight? Overloaded with chilli and my mouth now hates me. Woe.
After consulting Digiguide, there is absolutely nothing I want to watch on TV at this point. I end up watching football and giving my usual vague delayed-reaction commentary to Dave, who is in London. "There's a man. He tried to score, but the goalkeeper huddled over it, so he couldn't. He looks pissed off. No, I have no idea what the number is. Oh, he was in yellow."
After Dave goes back to his hotel I decide to go and watch a DVD in bed, apres injection. (Which are going well, btw. I'm just running out of virgin flesh to use. Twice-used spots are tough.) It takes me 10 minutes to choose a DVD as we now have too much choice. With the Chronicles of Narnia in hand I triumphantly ascend the stairs--which sounds better than waddling up the stairs, doesn't it?--only to discover that there isn't a spare power point for the DVD player.
I believe I ground my teeth for a while after this. When I did eventually hoist myself into bed, after checking the TV guide yet again, I settle on National Geographic as that looked interesting and safe. My definition of safe mostly includes no programmes lovingly detailing the life of jumping spiders or other insects. I couldn't have been more wrong.
I caught the tail-end of a programme about Supervolcanoes. Now I love volcanoes from a viewing perspective. They're fascinating. Tonight? I'm on the verge of ringing Dave--before remembering that he has no signal in his dungeon--and screeching that we don't have a bunker or a What To Do In Case of Volcano Plan for Speck. Heck, we don't even have a regular disaster plan or a designated meeting point! Plus, this particular program focused on the woes of America with no thought to the rest of the world, so I had even less idea of what to expect. Other than less crap on TV.
The next program--which I blessedly fell asleep half-way through--was about the risk of a major earthquake hitting the UK. By this point I wished that I'd taken the extra time to find a book instead. Apparently! There are a bunch of fault lines going through the UK that have long been thought to be dormant. No, fissures coming off fault lines, my bad. But after the quake in Dudley (4.0, IIRC), a devastating quake in Belgium (which I'm sure I never heard about) and a similar sort of thing in Australia (which I definitely never heard about), seismologists in the UK are very concerned.
People! We have no earthquake disaster plan! (The voice-over guy said that with such relish.) One of the lines they showed on the diagram before zooming off to talk about German fissures, ran across the south of England hitting both London and Bristol. (Apparently there's a nice big fissure which runs north to south through Germany, from the North Sea to Cologne. They focused on that, which meant the program title was a bit misleading.) So, is it time to move back to Scotland and force Dave to work remotely? I have no bloody idea as I fell asleep.
Surprisingly, I didn't dream. However, I'm not sure that I'll go anywhere near the TV today....
